those things

everybody has something or somebody they rely on when the going gets tough.
some may say, that that saved their life..others just have it just in case.
some things arent the greatest to hold on to..while saving your life, its also killing you slowly, and youre too in the moment to realize it.
it all started one day when everything seemed to be going wrong, and when "those things" were handy, you used them, and now its like an...addiction.
people say its your fault that you continue to do it, but is it?
what if theyre relying on it to make them fell...worth something?
that sense of happiness and numbness you feel when you do it..until the next morning when you realize what you really did.
im hurting the people around me, but im helping myself.
whats more important?